How to get started with BDSM, the erotic practice that requires the explicit consent of its participants
What is BSDM? Although BDSM is a concept that is often misunderstood, the practices encompassed under this acronym (Bondage-Discipline-Domination-Submission-Sadomasochism) have been part of the human sexual experience throughout history.
Furthermore, it can contribute to improving relationships, as they are activities based on open and honest communication between the participating adults, establishing clearly defined limits that, under no circumstances, can be crossed. In fact, these erotic practices, which can be seen as “different ways of experiencing and understanding sexuality,” have something very specific in common: explicit consent between the parties involved.
All of them, however, have long been taboo (in fact, they were often referred to as “erotic minorities”), but the influence of literary phenomena such as the “Fifty Shades of Grey” trilogy (as criticized as it was praised) has managed to give visibility to BDSM and make it clear, that sexuality is not “one,” but rather diverse, and that there are no sexual practices that are better or worse than others. This fact is very important because it allows us to break down certain prejudices surrounding these erotic practices.
Bondage is the practice by which someone is tied up or immobilized, and it usually has many followers, always with their prior consent. Domination, on the other hand, consists of “subduing and being served by the submissive person.” Content such as ebony BDSM porn has been circulating in the virtual world for a long time, and it should be able to give us a kind of “picture.” Essentially, BDSM is about submission, and that situation, somehow, creates great arousal for all parties involved (in the sexual relationship).
Submission, therefore, refers to “obedience to the dominant person.” Regarding sadism, masochism, and discipline, these practices are somewhat more complex to explain with a generic definition, as each can vary greatly depending on the practitioner. A situation where one party completely submits to being treated in any way by the other party can manifest in many forms. That is what causes BDSM and other sexual fantasies to be very complex. We cannot strictly define them. We can only apply their universal boundaries.
How to Get Started in BDSM
When it comes to learning more about BDSM, one of the best ways to address this topic is to consult a sexologist, as this will allow each person to assess the aspects that lead them to an interest in BDSM, such as their motivations, desires, and, above all, their set of values.
Regarding the information that can be found on the internet, in forums or groups of people who claim to practice BDSM, not all of them are trustworthy. In this regard, common sense will always be a great ally to sound the alarm in case some advice turns out to be unwise or unreliable. And if you have doubts while browsing certain specialized websites, we recommend not going any further. We repeat: common sense above all. If something jars you, it’s for a reason.
Honesty and Sincerity are Key in BDSM
When approaching a conversation with your partner about sexual games or practices you want to try, we recommend always doing so with sincerity. Often, we are afraid of how our partner will react, and that is precisely what leads us to not be completely honest. We’re worried about telling them our desires and fantasies, but deep down, it all comes down to this: we have a terrible fear of being judged. However, communication is key in any aspect of a relationship, and this especially includes sex.